I’m just going to step out for a moment so I can throw up on my fucking shoes. “OMG! I got an SUV for Christmas! My other car was so old and I just love myself so much that I decided to celebrate the Season of Conspicuous Consumption by buying myself a new one. I […]

WTF is going on with Flickr? Where are all of the GOOD pictures? If I see one more “wardrobe remix” of whatever some stupid broad decided to wear today or a picture of the contents of anyone’s purse in the “Interesting, last 7 days” lot, I’m going to fucking vomit. I don’t care what you […]

You are quite possibly the stupidest person I’ve ever had the misfortune to encounter in my en-fucking-tire life. I’m not telling you again…CLEANER SHRIMP ARE MARINE INVERTEBRATES AND YOU CANNOT KEEP THEM IN FRESHWATER TANKS. Dumbfuck.

Oh my GAWD, are you fucking brain dead? How much weed did you smoke over the past month? WHY is it that no matter how many times I explain to you how an anti-parasitic works and how the life cycle of the parasite itself affects the method of treatment YOU JUST DON’T GET IT?! I’ve […]

I like you, I think you’re a good-hearted person, and a nice one, too. That does not, however, mean I think the board will die a miserable death if you don’t make it there one evening, and it definitely does not mean you need to tell us every time you have some kind of appointment, […]

Secure fence, immigration wall, whatever you want to call it. Stupidest thing I ever heard of in my life. Well, maybe not stupidest, but ranks right up there. Useful for nothing except lining the pockets of the crony companies that get the contract to build it from whatever political party happens to be in power […]

I dunno whether I’m going to make it. For the past two nights, P has wanted to sleep on his back, and every time I turned him over to his side, he’d stay there for five minutes, then turn back. I know from experience that if he does that twice, he’ll do it through the […]

Fuck, fuck, fuck! Well, that’s what I get for eavesdropping and not asking questions, isn’t it? I breathlessly counted down the days until 03 October, then asked P last night what time (today) Dog Boy was supposed to come and get Stink Pig. He said, “I thought they were getting married on the fifth of […]

How many times am I going to have to say, “Cleaner shrimp are marine animals”? Marine. M-a-r-i-n-e, meaning, “lives in water with salinity similar to that of the ocean”, not meaning “fresh water”. Gah.

I’m not a control freak. I’m plenty fussy, perhaps even bordering on obsessive, but I do understand that there are just some things that are outside my control. WHY ARE SO MANY FUCKING CONTROL FREAKS ATTRACTED TO THE FISHKEEPING HOBBY?! Jesus H. Christ–relax a little. You aquatic micro-managers are batshit, and you drive me batshit! […]