Oh my fuckin’ nerves, that man is gonna drive me entirely batshit! Yes, I was logged into Flickr last night; I hadn’t been there since Christ was a cowboy, and it’s rude to ignore questions that people have asked, plus I like to thank people for their comments, and go visit their streams. Yes, I even visited his, since he does have some nice shots. Yes, I was logged into MSN, and although I was “Away”, that doesn’t necessarily mean I’m not at my desk; it just means I may or may not answer straight away and people mustn’t be offended if I don’t. If I’m so “away” that I’m not home, I usually stick a little note in my personal message. Yes, I have a plugin that displays whatever is currently playing in Rhythmbox. Yes, you may poke fun at my choice, since I usually just set R-box to randomly play whatever is in an entire directory so I don’t have to bother switching songs, and I have a lot of stuff I only “sorta like”, so the fact that it’s playing doesn’t mean I’m a fan or that I love it, only that I happen to have a copy of it and don’t dislike it enough to click the Next button. Yes, I have a webcam, and yes, it appears as “shared” on aMSN. No, that doesn’t mean you’re supposed to ask me whether you can view it, and no, it doesn’t matter how much I’ve had to drink–the answer is the same. The answer is…no.

Look, dumbass, when you asked why there are no photos of me in my stream and I told you it’s because it’s none of anyone’s business what I look like unless I say it is, you whined. Finally, I said a few photos of me do exist, but are available only to my friends…and you whined because you weren’t on the list. So you’d STFU, I put you on the goddamned list; it’s not like there are two hundred nudes of me on there (actually zero), so…meh. The fact that you have seen still photos of me does not mean you need to see the webcam feed. I’m sitting here at my fucking desk, which is not interesting in the least, and none of the conversations we have or ever will have are involved enough or important enough to require more than plain text and an emoticon or two, so you do not need to see facial expression or body language. If you misunderstand something I say, I don’t really care. I don’t mind being on-camera in the least–I do it nearly every day at some point in time–and I don’t mind being asked to send the feed, but dude, we are not friends, and I know you want to see so you can make some lame-ass flattering comment and we’ll become pals because I’ll just think you’re soooo sweet. Don’t hold your breath. I don’t know much about you beyond your name and the state in which you live, and frankly, that’s enough. I saw a photo of you once, I think, and yet don’t recall what you look like. I’m not interested enough to go look and remind myself. If you want to say “hey” once in a while and make some polite chit-chat, that’s fine with me, but if you don’t stop harassing me about that goddamned fucking webcam, I am going to block you, even if you’re likely to know I’ve blocked you because I’ll never appear online anymore, and even if you’re likely to be offended. For Christ’s sake, man…leave me alone. There are people I really like, people I like, people about whom I’m largely indifferent, people I tolerate, and people I try to avoid. You’re in the third group, swift heading for the last. People in the first two groups get webcam access if they want it, but they’re the only ones. You…are…not…on…the…list. Take the hint, dumbass–you’re beginning to creep me out. Christ, if you nag someone like me this much, I don’t ever want to see your wife because she must be a truly hideous beast.