The shit old people will buy.

Put a generic 8GB USB 2.0 flash drive in a Hammacher Schlemmer print catalogue in 2014, call it a “Picture Keeper” so old people will know what to do with it, and tell them it’s “smart” enough to know it has pictures on it and that it won’t duplicate pictures already on it, and it costs $59.95. You can even double the size to 16GB for only $99.95–that’s a lot of shots of the grandkids!

I had to specify USB 2.0 because that’s old technology that’s being replaced by USB 3.0, but I found a SanDisk that was comparable. SanDisk is a reputable brand, not some generic Chinese whatever, but close enough. When I plug this into a computer, my OS (Windows and Linux, at least, and probably MacOS, too) will recognize that it has pictures on it and ask me what I want to do, assuming I haven’t already set a default action. If I try to copy pictures from my camera or phone and those filenames already exist on the drive, my OS will ask me whether I want to skip copying those files, overwrite the existing files, or rename and duplicate. Windows and Linux (at least) will do this in plain English.  Assuming I am not a drooling idiot, I’ll figure it out. Price: $5.49 and free shipping. Free two-day shipping if I have Prime.

Old people will buy anything, especially if you tell them it’ll make fancy new computer stuff easier for them. Anyone who needs this will probably require two hours to find a USB port clearly labeled “USB”, and another hour to figure out how to get the cap off. It’ll take a call to a grandkid for instructions on plugging it in.