I shouldn’t get too upset about these because there is a sort of logic to the error, but it still makes me cringe to read them, especially first thing in the morning, and if people would look a little closer, it would make sense and they’d get it correct.

Good old apostrophe “s”, the simple possessive noun.

– The dog’s bark is particularly irritating before my second cup of coffee.
– The cat’s toy upon which I trod in the dark nearly tripped me.
– The man’s socks are always left on the floor.
– Denise’s jeans are so tight that she has a muffin top hanging over the waistband.

(Exception, name that ends with the letter “s”)
– Jess’ cellphone reception is poor, so she stands on the porch and shouts into it.

This is never “Jess’s”, or $deity forbid, “Jes’s”. A single apostrophe after the final “s” in the name regardless of whether there is one “s” or two, and do not add extra letters…ever.

I think the little signs that people have on their houses look…well, stupid, but they’re relatively common, and so are errors! The intent of the sign is to announce the surname (or at least one surname) of the home’s inhabitants, not to indicate possession of the house. Since these date from the time when families with the same surname lived in the homes, the sign needs the plural form of the surname, not the possessive. Even if the intent were to show ownership, then they’d still need the plural possessive, not the singular, and in any event, to be accurate, the signs would all have names like, “Regions Bank’s”, “Bank of America’s” and “First National Mortgage’s”.

The Harveys. Not The Harvey’s.
The Browns. Not The Brown’s.
The Norrises. That’s a sneaky one; add “es” if the name ends in “s”.

Possessive pronouns are different; the word itself indicates possession.

– Yours (NOT your’s…that makes the Grammar Nazi cry)
– His (most people get this one correct)
– Hers (NOT her’s…that makes the Grammar Nazi nauseous)
– Ours (most people get this one correct, too)
– Theirs (For the love of all that is good; theirs, theirs, THEIRS! NO form of there or they’re; never, ever...GOT THAT?)

This group has two exceptions, and so many people get these wrong that the Grammar Nazi wants to poke forks into her eyes and bemoan the future of literate humanity.

– The possessive form for “who” is “whose”. Remember Robert Frost and his snowy evening, “Whose woods these are, I think I know…” The word “who’s” is a contraction for “who is” and never, ever indicates possession. If you read the sentence and it doesn’t make sense to substitute “who is” for the “who’s”, then you did it wrong; change it to “whose”.

– The possessive form for “it” is “its”. Note the absence of an apostrophe, even though the word indicates possession. That is because “it’s” is the contraction of “it is”, not the possessive form. Again, if you cannot substitute “it is” for the “it’s” in your sentence, then you did it wrong.

There. I feel better. Not even 0800h and I’m already bitching about grammar because of something I read on some random web site. Yes, it’s going to be a good day–I can feel it!