I am not your private fish care consultant. Don’t send me PMs to ask questions that you can ask on the board. It may help you, but it doesn’t help anyone else, and it does take up my time, SO PUT YOUR QUESTIONS ON THE FUCKING BOARD WHERE OTHER PEOPLE CAN SEE THEM, TOO.

I did not just explain to an ADULT the concept of decimals as they pertain to the measurement of parts per million. I can’t possibly have done that because any adult should understand what 0.25 and 0.5 mean in relation to 1 ppm. If he doesn’t get this, I’m going to have to explain the […]

I’d called L. on Friday (?) because I had some little snippet of words in my head that I couldn’t quite remember and I thought he might. He didn’t return my call until yesterday, then we played phone tag until he finally won and I actually recognised the number. It’s been probably eight years since […]

“Why am I attracted to sick fish?” Because you want drama and sympathy, dumbass. Right or wrong, I buy sick fish sometimes, too. I bring them home, treat whatever disease they have and hope I caught it in time that they can recover. I don’t create frantic posts to ask for diagnostic help, and update […]

P.S. If you’re going to use a shitty free host that takes forever and a fucking day to send your data, please post only thumbnails, not enormous images. Irfanview is free for Windows, Mac comes with an image editor, and GIMP is free for Linux. Your huge pictures make my page load too slowly EVERY […]

I’m just going to step out for a moment so I can throw up on my fucking shoes. “OMG! I got an SUV for Christmas! My other car was so old and I just love myself so much that I decided to celebrate the Season of Conspicuous Consumption by buying myself a new one. I […]

Yes. Yes. Oh, my retinas. No. Christ, no! In all fairness, the photographer(s) who took the last shots were working with a catastrofuck of epic proportions to begin with and were not professionals like the first two, but they just made it worse by shooting in the dark instead of at twilight. I hope the […]