I don’t mind Jehovah’s Witness. They usually come when I’m feeding the fish on Monday morning and don’t have much time, but they’re always pleasant and polite, their hearts are in the right place and they’re doing what they do because they believe it’s a good thing. Our beliefs are different, but they aren’t hurting […]

Rare shot of the Greater American Golfreak, Golfus freakus, in its natural habitat–searching for lost discs in the woods. Normally a very shy creature, seldom captured on camera, but easily identified by its characteristic call of, “DAMN!” echoing through the woods near the shopping cart looking things in which the discs are supposed to land, […]

I don’t give a rat’s ARSE what you eat. Be vegetarian, be ovo-lacto vegetarian, be a fuckin’ card-carrying PETA freak bean-chomping, farting vegan if you want and it’s all the same to me, but you DON’T get to force your choices on a tiny, helpless fish that can’t even say, “Hey, dumbass–gimme something fit to […]

You know you’re getting old when the cops start looking less like “No sir” and more like “No, dear”. We went to the disc golf (henceforth known as DG) course today , and as we were walking along beside the park road after P let fly a wild shot, a cruiser drove by. I glanced […]

I’m here to help you, but I am not here to choose your fish, do your research or make suggestions based upon stock that may or may not be at the home of a breeder in another state whose name I don’t even know. If you’re concerned that he won’t have in stock the fish […]

Okay, Balthazar, I think I’ve enabled comments for new posts, but I’m not sure what I need to do to enable them for old ones. Apparently I have to run a command on the DB, but I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, so bear with me. If I fuck it up, there’s no […]

Hey, stinkpig–I didn’t give you the fuckin’ speaker system so I could listen to your shite lilith femusic at top volume. Turn it down, or better yet, turn it the fuck off, and while you’re at it, isn’t there a train passing through town pretty soon?

Jesus H. Christ. Is anyone HOME in there? If you must rescue fish, then by all means, rescue them–guilty of that enough times myself–but don’t expect them to chug along, hale and hearty as any to ever leave the clean, well-kept tank of a reputable hobby breeder. I’ve explained and explained, and I don’t know […]

I cannot possibly stay married to P, knowing that somewhere out there is Devastatin’ Dave the Turntable Slave. I’m absolutely overwhelmed by his sex godliness! The mullet, the molestache, lightning bolt (?) earring, red plastic sunglasses, sleeves torn off his shirt so lots of air gets to his hairy masculine armpits, fingerless gloves, leather pants, […]

Please, Christ, somebody kill me. As if the Americana wasn’t a foot deep over there already, yesterday he piled on even more in the form of….an Uncle Sam windsock. He’s got flags (four) hanging off the posts, another one or two stuck in a container of something or other, bunting on one side of the […]